Slabovian lore

[mr. pickler]

as long as Slabovia has been around, there also have been myths and legends, basicly lore. so, what have you heard or been told about the lore of Slabovia. what are some myths and legends of Slabovia.

for example :
i heard that the sun is really a Slabovian pig that was pollished so well, it shone brighter than the sun. ( see padoboy for more on this story)

[Hannah]

I heard that before the earth was made, there was just one big pig and a big potato. Somehow they fell in love, and managed to express their love, shall we say...rather intimately for a pig and a potato. Anyway, the Potato gave birth to a baby girl, which was half pig half potato. Unfortuantely it had the body of a potato, so it could not move. All the pigly energy went into sprouting little humans all around its body, and sometimes, the potato will snort like a pig, causing earthquakes, thunderstorms and tidal waves.

That is what I heard anyways...

[mr. pickler]

excelent, let me know if you hear anything else about Slabovian lore, mor know any more lore.

[PaddoBoy]

i heard a story from the brother of the wife of my cousin... that a long time ago the potato and the pickle where one and the same!!

i was shocked

he told me that it was like a Siamese twin and the got in a fight, at the top of the big pile of mud.
they fought two hole months till they found a sickle.
they asked the biggest pig on earth to slice them.
when they were separated they intimately felt sorry that they did that...

now still they live together and the bond between them was even stronger than before!!!

[The Tractor Magnet]

Err - there is a legend that once there was this legend that everyone forgot about and it became legendary. But I don't know much more. Apart from that, there is a goat that people say runs around the north of slabovia and eats stuff. Again, dunno much more about that...

[James Inglis Der neue Führer]

I heard Ilyich Ulyanov was secretly born here by a parents of Tractor Scrapers then moved to Russia as a giant colony of pigs chased tem out. which is the reason i came here

[No Dice]

Word on the street is that sonic the hedgehog is a complete rip-off of the slabovian badger wich i am led to believe was just your standard no frills badger until extensive millitary training was recieved. making thus badger extremely fast and ultimately very blue due to extremely cold climate.
have slobavia recieved a penny in royalties?

i think not or i could afford to buy another left shoe.

and some tinsel.

angryface.

[knockacrateopopoff]

the reason you cant afford a left shoe is because they where sent off in different pig carts to market
[ this was done to stop the thieves from stealing them] but the carts went off to different markets, hence over diss end we all got bucket fulls of right shoes... there is a stock market in the slabovian hills .. and they trade in theses shoes... currently the exchange rate for shoes is; 2 left shoes for one right shoe....
to get there you have to get the general to sign a camel warrant... theres a train of camels leaving the slabovian fish market on monday. it only takes 10 days to get there... but do guard your left shoe... there are one legged bandit out there on the road....

[Octavio Aguirre]

I've heard of a wizard that roamed around the earth who cast people into potatoes, because he loved potatoes, and only ate potatoes. One day,when the mysterious wizard came to a small village, he turned half the village into a potatoe farm, others were his workers who's jobs were to clean every single potatoe, untilit is spot-less.
UNFORTUNATELY, the workers had a problem, they had nothing to keep the potatoes clean, so they complain to the wizard and he said "Use your tongue to lick them then!".
And so, the workers licked the potatoes, every single one.
And thus, was the potatoe lickers were born,xept now theyare licked due to make sure theres no health hazards.
Whew.Well that was alot of words

[Seanov Davidoff]

I heard a Legend that the moon is actually a giant prize winning Potatoe, grown by our Slabovian ancestors Ivan and Ingrid Slavod, and sent into orbit using a giant catapult. The West tried shooting down the Potatoe but all the damage they could do was to create dents (the west call these "craters") on the surface (such is the strength of the Slabovian potatoe). When continual attempts to shoot down the potatoe failed, the west spread rumour and used propaganda to convince its population that the moon is actual a piece of rock (Stupid Western Pigs! Rocks? In The Sky? BAH!) and faked a "moon landing" to further afirm the belief with its people. Unfortunately, we Slabovians know the truth. Slabovia won the Space Race.

[mr. pickler]

very good, remeber any mor elore, aany more at all, keep it up. good job

[Hannah]

There was once a Slabovian architect called Noanski Jabogradskidelsakleftans, and many described described him as 'off the rails'. He dreamt of the great potato in the sky telling him of a great disastrous floodof pickle juice flooding the mighty pig we live on. He was instructed to build a huge tractor and save every pig, potato, pickle, tractor wheel and rock from the certain drowninisation. No one but the chosen things believed him, and they weresaved while the rest hadto stay as the pickle juice rained down. Noanski Jabogradskidelsakleftans was forever seen as a visionary, andwhen he died, he was priveliged to nibble at the grand potato orbiting around the earth.

[Seanov Davidoff]

This is very true. I have seen him in the sky, dancing on the potatoe, avoiding the western missiles.